How To Become A Podcasting Guru Over Night
Are you tired of being an average Joe when it comes to podcasting? Do you want to become a podcasting guru overnight? Well, my friend, you’re in luck because I’ve got the secret recipe to becoming a podcasting superstar. Follow these tips, and you’ll be the next Joe Rogan or Conan O’Brien in no time.
1. Always record your podcast in your PJs.
Yes, you read that right. You want to become a podcasting guru, so why waste time getting dressed? Just hop out of bed, turn on your microphone, and start recording. Your listeners will appreciate the authenticity and honesty of you in your PJs. I mean, who doesn’t want to know what you wear to bed, right?
2. Use the most annoying sound effects.
Your listeners will love the sound of a cat meowing or a baby crying throughout your entire podcast. Add in some background heavy metal music, and you’ve created a recipe for success. Who cares if the listeners can’t hear you over the noise, right? Right. Plus, it’s not like your guests will run away thinking you’re either crazy or unprofessional.
3. Start every episode with a joke.
You know what they say, laughter is the best medicine. So, start every episode with a joke, regardless of whether it’s funny or not. Your listeners will appreciate the effort, and the cringe factor will make your podcast memorable. Just make sure your joke isn’t offensive, or your Spotify account might be cancelled before you raise your voice for the next joke.
4. Ramble on and on.
Who cares about time limits or pacing? Just keep talking, and don’t worry about pauses or editing. Your listeners want to hear what you have to say, whether it’s for hours or minutes. Just ramble on about everything and anything, and don’t give up until you’ve said it all.
5. Never prepare.
Preparation is for the weak. Who has time for research and interview questions? Just wing it and let the conversation flow. Your guests will appreciate your uninformed questions and off-topic subjects. Plus, it’s not like there are any important details you might be missing, right?
6. Always interrupt your guest.
Who cares if your guest has a thought to complete? You have the microphone, and you’re in charge. Interrupt them, cut them off, and keep the focus on yourself. Your listeners are tuning in to hear you, not your guest, right? Right.
7. Never edit.
Editing is for amateurs. Just hit record, talk, and upload it. Your listeners can deal with the background noise, technical difficulties, and any awkward silences. Plus, editing takes time and effort, and who has that kind of energy?
So, there you have it, my friend. Follow these seven tips, and you’ll be the podcasting guru you always dreamed of being. It may take a little time to build your audience, but once they get used to your unique style, they’ll be hooked for life. You’re welcome.
Disclaimer: By no means do we suggest that you should actually follow these tips. This is a humorous article, and in reality, these tips will not help you become a successful podcaster. In fact, they will probably do the opposite. So please, make sure you’re well-prepared, professional, and entertaining, as that is the key to podcasting success. Thank you.